Park Foundation Music App
Home > Releases
311 Bygone Tales From The Realm Of Sauron
Overview
311 Bygone Tales From The Realm Of Sauron --- 2021-05-07
C92 housed in Disney Clamshells that have the cassette in baggies with additional art, and a 20 page zine with song titles and credits. Song 311 is 1:09 long, there is a pause before [a=Rhys Johnson] delivers a message and the rest of Side B is the album played in reverse. 50 Copies made. Note: some of the later songwriting credits are printed wrong in the booklet, these are per how they are listed on bandcamp. Additionally, due to error, [a=Sash Pozzie] is not credited in the booklet, these are again in line with the bandcamp. True Black Metal is a Traci Lords Loves Noise cover.
Artist Bio
Videos
Infernal Legions Of Mordor-311 Bygone Tales From The Realm Of Sauron (Full Album)
Tracklist
Introduction: The Disgusting Stench Of Burning Feces That Is Being Prepared To Be Catapulted Into The Castle As The Siege Commences
I Own Guns to Protect Myself from Code Orange Fans
Q Did 3/11
I'm Gonna Fight Lars Ulrich
Dfw Metal Mayhem Is Mad I Made Fun Of D&D, So I'm Gonna Do It Again (D&D Is Dumb)
The Fountain Is A Really, Really, Really Bad Movie
Straight Edge Hardcore Dudes Harm Women And Everyone Ignores It So They Can Keep Playing Mediocre Guitar Riffs
My Favorite Part Of Punk Is The Only Time I Hear From My "Friends" Is When They Want Something From Me
God Forbid, Hardcore Kids Do Anything Aside From Hardcore! What Posers!
Colton From Reanimated Miscarriage Is Going To Come To Texas And Fight Me
How Can I Be A Narcissist When I Look Like This
I Asked If My T-bell Diarrhea Sounded Like Carcass Or Impetigo Vocals, When It Was Closer To Demilich Vocals
Balding And Fucked
My Life Hasn't Been The Same Since I Got A Gandalf Hat
I'm Gonna Fight Gene Simmons
This Years Tornado Season Will Be The Midwest's Punishment For Egg Punk
Sacrifice Lumpy If You Want To Avert This
Take The Time By Dream Theater
My Dangly Earring Is A Personality Trait Right?
What Is This Venue's Sword Policy?
Dallas Metal Dudes And Their Collective Poop Fetish (The Ballad Of Eatin' Like A Big Fella)
Face It, You're In An Egg Punk Band
If I Wanted An Angry Italian Man To Yell At Me, I Would Go To A Sub Shop Instead Of The Hank Wood Show
Where Does Target Keep Their Noise Tables?
Punk Time Is Dead And It Is Buried In My Back Yard
Being Gaslit For My Hatred Of Raising Caines
Goatmoon Is Just Racist Wintersun
Opeth Is What Would Happen If You Made A Heavy Metal Harry Potter And Also Bad
Unprecedented Levels Of Dipshittery
Infernal Legions Of Mordor, The Pawn Stars Of Noisecore
I'm Gonna Fight Jimmy From Youtube
Playing Hacked Up For Barbeque By Mortician Is Work Appropriate, Right?
I Payed A Guy At A Ren Faire To Roast My Hobbit And Now My Hobbit Won't Go To The Ren Faire
Support Local Business, Especially When They Allow Me To Bring My Sword In
That Guy From Blood Incantation Looks Like A Scifi Writer Driven Insane By The World He's Created
How Many Times Will Bone Sickness Follow And Unfollow Me On Instagram
My Combat Alchemist In The Parking Lot Of An Egg Punk Fest Expelling A Bad Potion
Dallas Grindcore People Telling Us We Need To Play A Longer Set
That Feel When James LeBrie Say "Carpe Diem, Seize The Day"
Razorbumps Is A Rockabilly Band, Prove Me Wrong
Hey, The Firefly Jayne Replica Hat Stays On During Sex Okay???
Ending Friendships Over Catan Trade Embargoes
I'm Into Cynic And Atheist So You Could Say I'm A Bit Of A Jazz Fan
Rick And Morty Shirts Are The New Fedora
Hot Boxing Your Straightedge Friend With CBD
Only Two Whole Years Until The Next Season Of Venture Bros (This Did Not Age Well)
Writing Off A Six Month Sword-Making Apprenticeship As A "Business Expense" On My Taxes
Listen, Not Every Dumb Ass Statement You Make Has To Be A Song Title, And That's The Song Title
Straightedge Noisecore War Commando
Kommand Was Better When They Were Called Hoax
I Now Play This Card To Retain My Virginity
Mountain Dew Where Is My Sponsorship
Shitposting Songtitles From This LP On Facebook When I'm On The Clock At Work
Without Hesitation I Will Punish You About How And Why You Should Be Watching Venture Bros
"Walk This Way" Is The Worst Fucking Song
A.M.A.S. (All Men Are Simps)
My Friend Ryan's Mullet
Hell Yeah Bruther
Who's The Bigger Nerds, Us Or Vault Dweller?
Going To Ye Olde Pub Instead Of Watching The Bad Local Metalcore Band
Bald Larry Got License Plates That Say "Senpai"
Dystopia Is Skramz For Crusties
I'm Gonna Whup Varg's Tabletop Rpg Playing Ass
Sitting On The Porch Of House Of Tinnitus, Sippin' On Texas Cold Brew With Texas Mike
8/19/19; The Day Texas Mike Came Home
Cool Beans Let Me Play Cannibal Corpse Over Their P.A.
You Play In A Psych Rock Band (No One Cares About The Stupid Visuals You Have To Accompany Your Boring Music)
Dune Is Better Than Star Wars
The Butt Rock Song
A 12 Gauge Shotgun Full Of Our Lord's Forgiveness
Derik Can Only Harm You If You Know Of Him
Mountain Dew Doesn't Make Your Dick Shrink, I Was Born With A Micropenis
Taking A Mighty Push
Maggot Stomp Got That Pit Viper Sponsorship And That's Too Cool To Rip On
Writing Song Titles At 4:20 Am On Your Day Off Because You're On Some King Shit
Hey 1919 Can I Have My Money Back?
Oh Yes, Piss Off The Warlock
If I Crank The Sharpness And Contrast On My Mediocre Live Concert Photography Everyone Will Love It
Paying Any Amount Of Money For One Of Those Straight Edge Watches Is Fucking Stupid
Getting Asked To Play More "Customer Friendly Music", So I Put Mortiis On
Yes I Am An Admin On Metal Archives, And Yes I Talk To Women
We Shitpost Better Than Cruelster
Someone Once Called Me You Lord Of The Rings Lookin' Ass
Noisecore Is A Better Genre For Straightedge Liberation Than Youth Crew
Who Is This Mans Selling Pornogrind And Polish Extreme Metal Bootleg Tapes To Recycled And Not Me?
Pubic Floss Is My Favorite Ska Band
No Wait, Natural Man Is
I Went To A Noise Show On 9/11 And All I Got Was A Dollar
No You Don't Need A Gun
Tomb Mold Is My New Favorite Hypebeast Streetwear Brand
I'm Really Happy Seth Putnam Is Dead
Its Still Hilarious Josh From Anal Cunt Died Falling Off An Escalator
Tim Morse Got The Shit Kicked Out Of Him
Punks Who Cosplay As Darby Crash In 2020 Are Fucking Stupid
If I Gather All Of Dragon Ball Z On Vhs, Shenron Will Appear To Call Me A Nerd
Derailed Train Full Of Decapitated Oogles
Dumpster Diving For Forbidden Knowledge
I Miss Oil Spill
The Mullet That's Supposed To Save The World
Rest In The Arms Of A Dragon
Death Metal Was A Scam To Sell Longsleeve Shirts
Gun Dudes That Can't Cum Unless Their Wife Named Cindy Is Holding A Glock 7 Gen 3 To Their Bald Spot
Imagine Risking Exposure To Covid-19 To See A Soundcloud Rap Show
Tanking The Success Of My Noise Rock Band By Coming Out In Favor Of Driver's Licenses
The Mans With The Mortician Tramp Stamp Tattoo
Oh God No, Not Another Song Sampling Peter Jackson's Dead Alive
Your Pop Punk Has Breakdowns And Your Browser Is On A Watchlist
None Of Your Gorram Business That I'm Writing A Rutting Noisecore Song About Firefly
Firefly Lasted Longer Than I Do In Bed
Don't Open The Docking Port, You'll Let The Oboe In!!!!!
River Tam Will Kill You With Her Mind
Vhs Collectors Are Chill Ass Bros
The World Would Be A Better Place If Cookout Was A National Chain
You Smell Like You Play In A Grindcore Band
The Ballad Of The Egg Punk Demo Cassette
Simps Pretend To Like Death Metal To Lay Pipe
Your Band Has No Riffs
You Play In A D-Beat Band
Bodybag Darryl
I Was Paid To Take Photos Of An E-Girl, Take That 4chan
Average Time It Takes For People To Stop Caring About An Osdm Worship Band That Came Out On 20 Buck Spin
I, A 45 Year Old Man, Paid $100 To See David Yow Pull Out His Penis, Not To Talk Bad About My President
Amazing How White Drugs Was The Only Good Amrep Band
Remembering When The Drummer Of Skeleton Asked Me If He Should Listen To Obituary
We Bullied Taco Bell Into Bringing Back Potatoes On 311
Ah Yes, Jazz Fusion Covers Of Pokemon Route Themes
Harsh Noise Wall Track Using My Scrapped Brake Shoes
I Don't "Get" Noise Says The Person Who Likes 100 Gecs
Playing Brainbombs At The Function To Weed Out The Weak Friends
Everyone Is "We Love And Support You" Until You Threaten To Castrate Yourself With A Sword Your Friend Found In An Alleyway Next To A Car With A Broken In Windshield
This Song Is Just An Excuse To Sample Firefly
Nice Gatecreeper Shirt You Stupid Fucking Poser
"I Miss Going To Shows" Says The Sad Nerd Who Sat Outside During Every Band Smoking American Spirits
If Your Band Sounds Like American Football, I'm Kicking Your Fucking Ass
I Want To Fight People That Wear Suits In Public
Listening To Shadow Gallery To Experience What Dream Theater Would Be Like If They Had A Bass Player
Slint Is Just Korn But For Nerds
Okay, But What If I Said I've Never Actually Read Lord Of The Rings
Effortless Urination Of Bright Yellow Pee-Pee
We're Destroying The Baby Right?
The Darkest Magik
Yautja Is The Funniest Band In Metal, And The Most Handsome
Paying A Sex Worker To Just Cuddle Me, I'm Lonely
My Fetish Is Watching 30-40 Year Old Guys Imitate Steve Albini On Stage In At A Bar In Dallas, I Cum All The Time
Assigned Cowboy At Birth
All Hail Our Dork Lord And Master!
Beware Of Geeks Bearing Gifts
Ancient...Evil...And Hungry
Wizard Metal By The Numbers
A Harmless Giant From A Foreign Land
Survival Of The Thiccest
Sizzler Buffet For The Sexually Deranged
Yer Gonna Feel My Boot
Meat Mountain, Clogging Toilets And Arteries Everywhere
The Eye Of The Shitstorm
HOT GIRLS WITH SWORDS DOT COM
Muffled Sounds Of Gorilla Violence
Looking At Your Dungeon Tan I Can Tell That You're A Fan Of Mortiis
Yeah, I'd Get The Elf Ear Surgery
Keep The Adidas High Tops Free Of Blood Lest Ye Summon The Eldritch God Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
When The Reply Guys Swarm In
I Saw Rusty From Mental Abortion's Dick In Cabin Fever 2
You Play In An HM2-Core Band
Onlyfans But It's Just Chalrles Knowles Whuppin' My Ass
Thundersnow
Rise And False Grind
A Great Wizard, Ripping A Fat Bowl To Steely Dan
Skinhead But Not By Choice
Hanging Out At The Ren Faire With My Fellow Ugly LARPers
Noisecore For The Instagram Clout
Dark Highwayman, Encountered At Dusk Upon His Steed Named Sempai
Remembering When Sawblade Threatened To Strangle Me When I Was 19
Getting Fired From My Job As A DJ At A Bar For Playing The Traci Lords Loves Noise Reissue On Breathing Problem
I Got Cum All Over My Lone Wolf Audio Maggot Stomp Collab Distortion Pedal T-Shirt So I Ordered Another One
Using The Blood On The Eerified Catacomb Cassette To Make A Clone Of U.E. And Have My Own Pet Hypebeast Nekro Black Metal Machin
Making Fun Of Other Bands To Hide My Rage That No One Likes My Band
Smashing Your Head Into A Master Sword Replica After Laughing At How Stupid A New Infernal Legions Of Mordor Song Is
Having Gorenoise Tapes From Breathing Problem Productions Delivered To My Job
Are You Really Vibing Or Are You Just Giving Off Deadly Levels Of Ionizing Radiation?
We All Have Mustaches Now
Mute The Sword
We're Tall, You Aren't
Oh, Great, Another Band With Parker Lawson Doing Vocals
Temporary Secretary By Paul McCartney Started Egg Punk
We Need More Death Metal Distortion Pedals
Matt, "Peavey", Perrin Has A Gun
I Have A VHS Collection Instead Of A Personality
Kinkshaming Someone For Listening To Brainbombs
A Horsedrawn Carriage Full Of Ass
Buzzword Death Metal
Who Do I Have To Make Fun Of At The Dallas Observer To Finally Get Them To Notice Us?
What Isn't Beneath Tom G. Warrior's Beanie
Going To Tennessee To Finally Beat The Shit Out Of Thrashhard08
Infertile Hails
Avantasia Wrote A Power Ballad About Incest
Pickles Strutting His Noisecore Clout With A Trans Am
How Quickly Will Any Of The Guest Performers On This Regret Being On This Tape?
Giant Ass Sword
The Only Way To Escape The Grip Of Longmont Potion Castle Is Death
This Skullet Is A Poor Attempt To Cover This Red Neck
Qui-Gon Epstein
Deadbeat Disrocker Dad
War Metal Gauntlet With A Rail Of Blow
Who Is This Strange Man Who Entered My Keep With A Garment That Reads “RATLORD”
Anal Cunt Song Titles That Unfortunately Live Rent Free In My Head
Bald Larry Correcting Me About The Avantasia Incest Song
Highest Regarded Opinions Of The Tech Death Guitar Player
Black Metal Finsta
Dr. Alican Koc
Thank Fuck The Nerve In This Tooth Finally Died
Consuming My Slain Enemy's Heart For His Courage, His Brain For His Intelligence, And Eating His Ass
Getting Brain Juices All Over My Livestream Blood Incantation Shirt While Getting A COVID Test
You Play In A Perverse Homage Raw Black Metal Band
There Is A Box In The Back Of My Bedroom Closet With Dollar Signs Drawn All Over It With Nothing But Mark Winter Demos In It
A Trashbag Full Of Blow To Be Delivered To The War Metal Band
We're All Poseurs (Especially You)
Allegiance Formed With Mountain Of Smoke In The Realms Of Meatcraft
Dick Armor
Fully Erect Alchemist
Your Aluminum Guitar Won't Get You Into Heaven Anymore
My Ass Is A Furnace
O Thank Thee, Guardian Of Metal
You Listen To Discharge
A Goblin Swinging A Sack Full Of Quarters
Great Another Smelly Asshole Who Thinks Video Violence Is A Good Movie Telling Me That Hereditary Sucks
Charles Entertainment Knowles, Top Fan
You Play Math Rock (And You Suck At It Too)
You Told Me 'Look Man, I Put Out Records And Tour' But You Still Can't Write A Riff
Getting Targeted Ads For The Thicc AT&T Girl
Razor Girl From Brutal Legend Based Sexual Fantasy
If You’re Looking For Riffs In Contemporary Music And You Listen To Punk, I Have Bad News For You
You Listen To Death Metal (And You Smell Like It Too)
I Got A Friend Request From The Guitarist Of Devourment
You Listen To Opeth
Hanging Out In The Alley Behind J&J's With A Bunch Of Stupid Fucking Metalheads Listening To Celtic Frost
Crust Fund Kids Saying They "Don’t Even Like Money!" All The Way To Their Parent's Bank
Having To Wear A Diaper When You Listen To Disembowelment Because You Keep Shitting Yourself
Telling Pantera Fans The South Won't Rise Again
My Wizard Hat, Taking To The Wind, Revealing My Bald Spot To The World
I Have My Very Own Lime Scooter And A Sword, Fear My Whimsy
Hitting The Character Limit On Bandcamp Song Titles
Derik The Hobbit
Imagine, If You Will, Rick Wakeman Wearing A Cape
It Smells Like Loneliness In Here
Explaining Anal Cunt To My Boss
If You Enjoyed Watching The Movie Martyrs, You Are A Bad Person
In Other News I Made A Noise Musician Mad On Twitter
This Isn't An Elf Cosplay, I Just Look Like This
The Only Time Anyone Cares About When You Pick Up An Instrument Is When You're Playing Cover Songs
The Reviews Are In
I Am A Late Game Boss That Is Hinted At For Two Thirds Of The Game That Has A Rare One Of One Loot Drop
Matt "Peavey" Perrin Demands To Be Sponsored
I Can't Believe Sleep Made A Career Off Of Ripping Off Sweet Leaf
Fremen For Vengeance
How Many Of Those Facebook Likes Did Your Band Have To Buy?
Being A Gatekeeper Fucking Rules
Starving For A Thirst Trap
Oh Good, The Blood Funnel
At Night, My Eldritch Supercomputer Crawls Under The Covers For Warmth
Selling My Punk Demos Before The Hype Dies Down And Getting Premium Prices On Discogs
You Listen To Iced Earth
Sometimes I Just Re-Read This List Of Song Titles, Not For Fun, But Because I Have Very Little Going On In My Life
Fancy Delights Ov The Void
Someone Stop Oyabun666 From Listing Every Punk Bandcamp Release on Discogs, No One Cares
Frozen Soul Weightlifting In Eternal Champion Merch
The Eldritch And Horrifying Mating Calls Of The Denizens Of 'Dega
The Lasting Legacy Of The Aughts Punk Band That Put Out a Demo, An EP And Only Played Fests
For Some Fucking Reason, I HAVE To Be THE Most Metal Person At this Estate Sale
Watching The Incel Uprising Tank The Stock Market
Another Song Where We Use Our Favorite Word, Eldritch, In The Title
You Play A PRS
Pounding Beers With The Goblin
Christopher Lee If You Are Out There And Can Hear Me: Please Haunt Me
Keep Your Mage Hand Strong
No One Asked Steven Wilson For Those Remixes
Hypnotized By ANTIFA Temptresses
Deep Within The Eternal Chambers Of The Pizza Dungeon
Unfriending Me On Facebook Won't Make Folk Punk Good
I'm Gonna Fight Froggy Fresh
Another Song To Flex Our Obscure Horror Knowledge By Sampling Bloodsuckers From Outer Space
Punk Goes...Country
It's Always Sunn O))) In Philadelphia
Fear Is The Painkiller
We're Available On I Heart Radio
You Listen To Comfy Synth
Asking The Owner Of Recycled Permission To (Continue To) Haunt Recycled When I Die
Sick Caveman Riffs
I Would Die 1000 Deaths For Texas Michael, Esq
Don't You Hate It When Assholes Break The Magickal Blood Seal
I Spit On Your Graveland
I Am Not Pausing Neil Young To Listen To This
Givin' Them Ghosts A Show
You Play In A Youth Crew Band
True Black Metal
Your Grandma Doesn't Need To Die Because You Couldn't Wait To See Ruptured Goat Anus Gurgle About Sexual Assault
Are You Aware Of The Power Of Shadows?
Keep Your Blade Held Aloft
I Screamed These Vocals Into A Sword
Livin' La Vida Don Vito
Cockblocked By A Self Proclaimed Shaman
You're Bleeding And I'm Tired
You Listen To 80's Yes
We Are Three Hundred And Three Songs In, Take A Break, You've Earned It Weary Traveler, You Are Almost There.
(Where Did) N.T.S.B. Fuckin' Go
Automatically Spawned With Blade In Hand
Townie Punks Fuck Off
Oh Man, Your True Crime And Bondage Themed Power Electronics Bands Must Get You All The Girls Huh Champ?
Anything Is A Musical Instrument If You Tape A Contact Mic To It, Duh
Not To Get Political Or Anything But Absurd Fucking Sucks
Wow, I Really Can't Believe You Have Listened To This Whole Fucking Thing. Whatever Sinks Your Ship
Amber Is The Colour Of My Anime / The Closing Ceremonies